Did She Read It?

Source: New Yorker

M.Snowe has a quiz for you all! You should definitely check out Ryan Lizza’s New Yorker piece on Michele Bachmann. The journalism is great, the conclusions are scary. If you were in any doubt about how insane some of her views are, please go read the piece to solidify your opinion. Also, Slate’s Double X Gabfest had some fun discussion about it and the Newsweek cover on their weekly podcast.

Lizza’s piece highlights a lot of the published works that either helped solidify Bachmann’s own political ideology, or works that she holds up as examples of said ideology (during speeches or on her campaign websites).

Below are a list of book titles or articles that Bachmann espouses mixed in with ones I made up. Obviously, a good quick google will give you the answers, but let’s be honest, that isn’t really what this is about, is it?

DID SHE READ IT?

1. –The Homosexual Revolution: End Time Abomination

2. —Taxes and Tea: Drowning in Liberal Swill

3. —Public School, Pubic Hair: How Mandatory Sex Ed. Destroys Childhood

4. —Atheism, Socialism, Legal Marijuana and The Beach Boys

5. –Communism, Hypnotism and The Beatles

6. –Biography of Robert E. Lee by J. Steven Wilkins

7. —Broadway and Glee: Counter-Culture Jihadis

8. –Christianity and the Constitution, by John Eidsmoe

9. —Dominionism: A Practical Guide (Though Technically You Won’t Need That as a God-Appointed Ruler of Earth)

10 —Everybody Poops…But Ronald Reagan

Answers below!

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Real Bachmann-endorsed books: #’s 1, 5, 6, & 8

Fake stuff Bachmann would almost certainly endorse anyway: # 2, 3, 4, 7, 9, 10

Notes on the less-interesting/provocative-sounding titles:

In the Wilkins book,  he claims “most southerners strove to treat their slaves with respect and provide them with a sufficiency of goods for a comfortable, though–by modern standards–spare existence.”

In the Eidsmoe book, the text claims that the founders (John Jay, Alexander Hamilton and John Adams) “expressed their abhorrence for the institution of slavery,” as “many Christians did,”  but they didn’t free their slaves because of their inherent “Christian benevolence.” He goes on to explain it would’ve been hard economically and socially for the slaves to be free at that time, so freeing them would’ve been “inhumane and irresponsible.”

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The “Natural” Superiority of Women

Written by Ashley Montagu. “Ashley” like the Gone with the Wind character “Ashley” (i.e. male). A man says women are better, so it must be true!

This book was courteously brought to my attention by my friend Dan, who likes to assume the air of a juicebox, but is actually quite a funny dude (here’s the proof).

M.Snowe thinks the best way to handle this is to play some paperback roulette. Get ready for weekly pearls of wisdom.

Don’t you too want to know some of the insights this book revealed, the ones that “stirred a controversial storm of both praise and condemnation from aroused readers?”

Wouldn’t you also like to be aroused?

Wouldn’t you like to know if “only men suffer from webbing of the second and third toes, bark-like skin and hairy growth on the ears”? (The hairy growth deadens the senses)

This is the kind of hard-hitting sexual politics our generation lacks.

M.Snowe randomly picked page 112. (Chapter 9–Women and Creativity)

“Why is it there have been no great musicians among women, no great logicians, philosophers, and poets? Why so few musical instruments of the first rank, painters, scientists, inventors, and technologists? Have not women, from the earliest times or, at least, during the last few hundred years received an education in music, in painting, and been employed in kitchens to which they have not, by their own invention, contributed (so it is usually said) a single gadget?

You know, that’s a good question. Why hasn’t a single woman throughout the recorded history of the world created a single thing? Aside from huge credit card bills? My money (at least, the money that I didn’t spend on my appearance) is on menstruation.  The blood in the uterus is the most creative (as it was supposed to “make” a baby) and it’s lost every month. That’s why M.Snowe is going to an invent a menstrual blood dialysis machine. Watch out, creative world. Here come the women. We’ll be juiced on baby batter blood and as creative as all get out.

Next time–let’s consider to Rousseauian implications of whether or not horrible women drivers are actually a phenomenon.