–A canopied elephant ride through the forests of India
–A large foie gras poached in butter and hyena truffle oil
–An Ivy-League education, including room, board and apprenticeship with Larry Summers
–The secret antidote to all hangovers, forever
–Your curmudgeonly father’s undying approval of all your death metal tattoos
–A monogrammed four-in-hand carriage that takes you to any time or place you desire as long as that time and place includes fairies
–Brunch prepared and served every Sunday by the entire original cast of Beauty and the Beast, on Ice
*This is the only one listed above that is currently available for purchase via paypal.