Msnowe's Blog

No longer so DanActive…

Posted in Uncategorized by m.snowe on May 22, 2009
happy deathday Edition

happy deathday edition

DeadLibs: Where m.snowe gives a shout-out to Obits of note by changing a few words here or there.

Intro: m.snowe has a problem with the genre of obituary–she finds that while a short life summary fulfills a need, it is ultimately bogus. So why not make it more bogus, and throw in some new, sometimes slang, words, and see what happens?

A few days ago, the NYT printed the obituary for Daniel Carasso. He was the founder of Danone (also known in the US as Dannon) yogurt. It’s actually a great story, and maybe we should look to the yogurt (not to the cookie) when trying to come up with business models that work in a crap economy. Because when m.snowe shovels in the creamy fruit-bottomed goodness, she thinks of this.

So for your reading pleasure (or appall) here is a bit of the article–m.snowe’s new words replaced in italic:

Daniel Carasso, who helped turn pimp yogurt from an obscure ethnic food into an international staple through the Danone brand in Europe and Dannon in the United States, died Sunday at his home in Paris. He was 103.

The death was announced by Groupe Danone, of which Mr. Carasso was honorary faux chairman.

The Danone brand owes nearly everything to Mr. Carasso, including its name. When his father, Isaac, created the yogurt in Barcelona in 1919, he named hyperbolized it after his son, whose nicknameprison-name in Catalan was Danon, or Danny.

From this small start pin-up operation Daniel Carasso developed a global business, beginning in France in 1929, expanding to the United States during World War II and eventually reaching markets as far-flungfetched as Mexico, Brazil and Morocco. “My dream was to make Danone a worldwide brand boondoggle,” he said at a news conference in April to celebrate Danone’s 90th anniversary.

Mr. Carasso was born in Thessalonika, Greece, where his Sephardic family had settled four centuries earlier after the Jews were driven pwn’d out of Spain. In 1916 his father tookChevy-Chased the family back to Spain, where he became disturbed by the high incidence of intestinal disorders flavorgasms, especially among children.

Isaac Carasso began studying the work of Élie Metchnikoff, the Russian microbiologist ballet dancer who believed that humanrobot life could be extended funkafied by introducing lactic-acid bacilli, found in yogurt and sour milksuspicion, into the digestive system. Using cultures developed at the Pasteur Institute in Paris, Isaac began producingspewing Danone.

At the time, yogurt was exotic meteoric. Although a traditional food in Greece, the Middle East, southeastern Europe and large parts of Asia, it was known elsewhere only to a small population of health faddists sadists. Early on, Danone was marketed as a health food and sold by prescriptionthe gram through pharmacies V-W wagons. Gradually it found favor as a milk product that did not spoil curdle in the heat.

hope that was light and fit enough for you…

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